Defiant stage

[jaqulineh]

I'm getting extremely frustrated with my 3 year old. She is a very bright and lovable child but I feel she is being very manipulative. We spend every night with a routine of bath brush teeth story milk then bed. For the past week when its bed time she is coming up with every excuse to come out of her room and play. Whenever I tell her to go to her room she starts yelling and sits on the floor and says just carry me then.My husband and I are getting very frustrated because she's doing the same when she needs a time out or even alone time. I don't believe in spanking her every time she gets in trouble and I want her to express herself but she needs to listen. Any ideas on what to do to at least help with bed time?

[Jamie L.]

I am having the same problem (coincidence? since they are only a month apart haha) he is yelling too and saying give me that! all of the time. Time outs don't work anymore and he will not stay in bed I know this doesn't help you at all lol but I'm in the same boat

[jaqulineh]

Lol it actually does help a little knowing it's not only my child lol. The oldest (my stepdaughter) didn't go through this with the bed time but her father would lay down with her every night till she fell asleep and in the middle of the night she'd wake up so he'd have to do it again. I def don't want to do that. It caused a strain on our relationship before. Last night was a little better for Meike she refused to eat dinner so I sent her to bed without. She got up about 4 times but each time I didn't say anything or get upset. I just picked her up walked her to her room laid her down and said I love you. It felt calmer overall. I think I may try this tactic for a couple more days to see if its really working. If it doesn't I'll try something else. Oh and this morning she ate a huge breakfast lol.

[melomom]

Unfortunaltely this is a stage they all go through. Patients and consistancy is the only thing that works. you must stay the one in charge. Love you both.. you are great mommys. this too shall pass

[reallifedad]

Ive been 1 on 1 with Andrew for a few weeks since Jamie is out of town for work. He has been testing the waters a lot. Best thing is don't cave, do not discuss it (its just giving the negative attention they want) He does the same thing so I'll pick him up and put him right back to bed. He has not done it in a few days now so hopefully it helps. I notice he is trying to see how far he can push it and if I don't follow through he will just keep doing what I'm trying to get him to stop. The time out thing only works if I put him out of the room I am in, away from the TV and toys. The other methods I have been trying during the day is trying to beat him to what he is manipulating. I can see it coming half the time so it makes it easier, other not as obvious such as daddy give me this, I follow with a "how do you ask" and I will receive the proper question. HOWEVER! I also noticed that every time he asks the proper way I cant give in even if he pouts a little bit, sometimes you still have to say no, I try to explain it and he will usually say OH KAY (frown) and go on about his business

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